18 January 2015

Single Again

Why is it I meet someone new, that something happens and the relationship self destruct it in .2 seconds?  I realize this is rhetorical and I may never have an answer.   Deep down I know I'm afraid.   I've lost so much in my life the thought of something real and permanent seems so far from my line of sight.

I'm not some skinny girl who attracts all the boys!  I've got curves some in the right places and some not.  What I do have is this huge ability to give love and the willingness to open my heart to someone only to have it squashed into nothingness..  This ache I feel right now I know with time it will become dull and only hurt at the odd moments.   Right now it's so raw and open I genuinely feel as if blood is squirting directly out of my heart to the point where I will cease to exist.

All of this I'm sure seems trivial to some, but trust me when I say I'm very much a gaping wound open and bleeding and there is nothing anyone can do to fix it.  Time will be the great healer and even time itself can only do so much.   I hope 2015 has started better for you than me...

Remember to work hard, be strong, and love with all that you are.
Becky

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